Epidemic

I am sick of it.  Seriously.  If only there were a vaccine against it.  Because just knowing it exists does not protect you from it.  It is such an epidemic and I just don't know what to do about it anymore.  It consumes me and exhausts me.

It is Mom Guilt (or Dad Guilt for you men).

You know, that voice that screams, "All good moms/dads stay at home with their babies", "Good moms/dads don't have to drop their kids off at daycare and watch as their kid cries and throws themself across the floor because they don't want you to go", "Good moms/dads cook a healthy, homemade dinner every night", "Good moms/dads don't watch any TV and play constantly with their children", "Good moms/dads never check their iPhone in front of their children", "Good moms/dads would make homemade Valentines and not cop out and buy them from Target"...and I could go on and on with working-mom Mom Guilt assaults.

Now, I know that I am a good mom.  I love my child with every fiber in my being and try to make the best choices for him.  I hug and kiss and tell him I love him constantly.  We laugh and chase and tickle often.  He is happy and thriving.  I can see that.  Why do I still have Mom Guilt????

Crazy thing is, despite the literal hours of my life I have spent berating myself for being a working mom, I am pretty sure I would be a lousy stay-at-home-mom.  I am positive I lack the patience, creativity and inspiration to be a great stay-at-home-mom.  And what is worse, I don't think that stay-at-home-moms are immune to Mom Guilt either.  So in the event that I could be a stay-at-home-mom, the damn Mom Guilt monkey would still be present!  Problem not solved. 

I have never had the opportunity, but I can imagine the stay-at-home Mom Guilt assaults, such as "Good moms/dads have a cleaner house", "Good moms/dads cook a healthy, homemade dinner every night", "Good moms/dads don't watch any TV and play constantly with their children", "Good moms/dads would always have the laundry done", "Good moms/dads never check their iPhone in front of their children", "Good moms/dads would make homemade Valentines and not cop out and buy them from Target", "Good moms/dads would volunteer their time more in their child's classroom", "Good moms/dads home school their child(ren)", "Good moms/dads can handle more than 1 or 2 children"... and on and on.

But here is what I am really afraid of, if I have more children, does the intensity of Mom Guilt double for 2 kids, triple for 3 kids, and so on?  God, I hope not.  I may be physically and mentally paralyzed.  Instead, my only hope is that it only adds like 10% extra guilt per child.  I think I could handle just a bit more before it breaks me in half.  That is the best case scenario.  I am sure I am greatly underestimating that, too.

What about you?  What do your Mom/Dad guilt assaults sound like?