Friday, December 14, 2012

Yelling, loudly

So I guess 2 is when you really start yelling at your kid.  I mean when they are 2 and turn into some mini dictator with a bad attitude.  Before then, you may gently scold them,

"Now Sully,  that's pretty."

"No no honey, that's hot."

"You are just being silly now."

I foolishly thought that since Sully had really been exerting his independence since he was 10 months old that once he turned 2 I would be in the upswing of things. 

Stupid.idoit.moron.delusional mom.

Turns out that is NOT the case.  Let me submit this week's drop offs as evidence.  Cue the drama: tears, back arching, hitting (yes hitting!), flailing and screaming.  Imagine 3 grown women buzzing like bees around this noise offering anything for distraction:  juice, milk, juice or milk in a big boy cup, juice or milk in a red/blue/green big boy cup, banana, pancakes, pancakes with "dip", a car, a blue/yellow/red car, a book, a book about cars...and the list goes on.  All the while, his tirade continues until I either give up and walk out (I try to only stay for a minute or 2 since I hear that 30 seconds after I leave, he makes an amazing recovery) or he decides that orange juice in a red, not blue or green, big boy cup is ok, today. 

Apparently, the rest of the day he is fine.  I am sure he has a few moments but nothing full scale.

Let me also submit this week's evenings as evidence as well.  Cue more drama:  lying on the floor wailing because I did not offer him the correct snack which escalates into a completely inconsolable small human kicking and hitting (more hitting) and running into things until either a) I offer a snack he deems appropriate which may or may not be the snack he envisioned when we first got home, b)  he is allowed to eat a snack he probably shouldn't, ie chips, chocolate, candy, etc, c)  I send him to time out or his room until he stops crying (which he will go to these areas but may or may not stop crying completely) or d)  he just decides he is done crying.

Then there are a slew of small, seemingly insignificant occurences that can set off another episode:  a toy that does not bend a certain way, a wooden stick that once broken in half does not magically snap back together, Turbo laying on one of his Bs, not playing a certain episode of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles from the DVR menu, placing his cheerios/goldfish crackers in the wrong area on the coffee table...just to name a few.

I mean, it is like he doesn't yet understand the laws of physics or the fact that we understand English or that there or other, more horrible things in life. 

Ok, I feel better.  Thanks for listening.

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