The "Good Days"

I have this terrible compulsion to read every single parenthood/motherhood/toddler town article on Facebook.  Articles about how fast the little kid years go by.  About how tough it is now but someday, those articles promise that I will look back at this time and miss it.  I will miss the little messes.

The messes that are easy, although maddening when done 50 times per day, to clean up.  The tiny, high-pitched voices that echo through the halls screaming, "MOMMY!?!"  Gallons of bathwater on the floor.

Tiny sticky hands constantly reaching for me.  Countless nights of mombie-ing through the house tending to baby people that are scared/sick/lonely/hungry/just plain not tired.  Crates overflowing with teeny tiny shoes.

Finding half eaten chicken nuggets/breakfast sausages/pieces of gum strategically placed behind chairs so I don't find them until days later.  Never getting to eat a full, warm meal or drink an entire coffee while it is still hot because there is always 1-5 other needs that require attention.  Sippy cups strewn throughout the house that you hope to God are not days old with curdled milk.

I certainly cannot contest the fact that time really is flying by at the speed of light.  I don't know how my first baby is almost 5 and my littlest baby is almost closer to 2 than 1.  I don't know how the hell I got to be closer to 40 than 30 but I am.  Time is sneaky like that.  Just keeps going on and on regardless of what you are doing.  

But I find it impossible that I will be upset by being needed just a smidgen less every moment of the day and night.  I truly find it hard to imagine how having just a few more moments of time to myself would be so bad.  But they all say its true, I will soooo miss these "good days."  

So I am trying.  Really trying to see these days as beautiful messes and maybe even live in the beautiful mess for just a bit before quickly sweeping, collecting, wiping and mopping it up.  Maybe even capture the beautiful messes with my camera and keep these moments forever.  Or better yet, share more of them here on the blog.  I mean, you would love to see a days old chicken nugget perfectly hidden behind an ottoman, right?

The right now

I don't know why it is so hard for a person like me to live in the right now.  I have always had so many plans and dreams for myself, realistic or not, that I have been in a constant state of anticipation for the next step in my life.  Always working on advancing my career, the next DIY craft project or making and growing a baby;)  Not that this is always a bad thing, it can propel me forward toward my goals and keep me motivated.  However, living this way has caused me to stop enjoying the present because I was always reaching for the future.

This maternity leave has been just what I needed.  Not only do I have the most perfect little girl to get to know as well as spend more time teaching and watching my son grow and learn, I really, for the first time in forever, feel like I am living in the present.  Really feeling it....and enjoying it.

I am finding myself enjoying the activities of daily life that had seemed so monotonous and trivial to me just weeks ago.  Drinking a good cup of coffee, bath time and bedtime routines, making dinner.  I really can't explain or pin point what caused the shift in me.  Maybe I was waiting and longing for my daughter to join our family and now that she is here, I feel more complete.  Maybe it is the endless hours of nursing her that forces me to slow down.  Maybe it is this break from my job that I so desperately needed.  I don't know.

What I do know is that is feels good to live this way.  To feel everyday instead of rushing, rushing, rushing.  It's not that I don't have goals and dreams for the future anymore, I just don't feel in such a hurry to get there.

What am I enjoying today?  Easter basket shopping:)

 Yes, he has more stuff.  But he is older:)

Done except for a few hair pieces for Sydney that I ordered off of Etsy.

I seriously had so much fun buying Easter basket goodies.  And I realized that one day, my kids will be grown and I won't get to do things like buy Easter basket goodies.  They won't need me to bathe them or make them dinner or read them stories.  They won't wake me up at night or require my attention every second of the day.

Of course, this realization does not make being a mother any easier.  It is hard as hell to be a mom (or a dad).   There are moments that are absolutely maddening or gross (I don't know if my bathroom floor will ever be clean again) or exhausting.  But they are upstaged by the moments that melt your heart and fill you up with joy.

For the first time in a long time, I can say I don't know for sure what my future holds for my career or my family (Are we done having kids or not???).  I am just going to take it day by day and keep trying to live and enjoy the present the best I can.

'Round here

Yep, we got a sick little boy here.  It is the first mystery fever he has had.  By mystery, I mean he is not teething, doesn't have a cough, isn't particularly stuffy, has no rash, no diarrhea and is not tugging at his ears.  I know because I watched him like a hawk today and yesterday.  

(I know what you are thinking, "but aren't you still recovering that awful adult tonsillectomy recovery?!?  How can you possibly take care of a sick toddler too??"  Luckily, I do feel somewhat better, like maybe 60% of my "normal" so that helps.  You may not think this seems that good but when I was about 15% for 3-4 days, 60% is fantastic.  I am still not eating much.  Anytime I eat, I get severe razor blade throat and it is nearly unbearable.  So I usually eat once a day, something sort of soft, hopefully with some protein to really make it count.  It is usually at dinner time.  So the rest of the day is fluids and italian ice (thanks Angie!).  Yeah, I am starving.)

So Mister Man had a fever at daycare yesterday and I was called to pick him up.  I had him at home with me today and he was doing pretty good until about 5 pm when he spiked a temp of 102.6!  What?!?  I could see it all in his poor little eyes:(  He didn't eat much for food today but did have some PB&J for lunch. I thought I was going to have to count the jelly as his fruit for the day but he rebounded after a bath and some meds so he actually did get a real fruit today.

Now he is struggling to go to bed and my heart is breaking for him.  I think I will go rock him.

Oh, and look what arrived in the mail today!  Birthday invites!!!

Potential

So I have this problem obsession.  I love to scout out new places where I can force more family pics on my hubs and son.  And I found the perfect location for some family pics this fall.  I learned about it a few weeks ago when my friend, Ashley, took me there.  It is a little park where the swings are shaded in the afternoon.

And so is most of the playground equipment.

But that is what caught my eye.

The choo choo.

So Sully and I went there today to scout it out some more. He loved it.

Or at least he did until I started forcing him to take pictures...

I can't wait to go back in a few months.  I have lots of pic ideas.  Hopefully, I can talk someone into snapping a few pics with my camera.

Yes, choo choo, we will be back...

Monday Funday

When I woke up this morning, it was a dreary, rainy day.  I was super pumped for a lay on the couch, watch movie day.  It was not long before the sun was out and it was too nice to stay indoors.  So Sully and I took a trip to Babies R Us (that store gets me just as bad as Target).  After our attempt at an oil change failed, we headed home to fill up the pool.

Buds.  (see how nice and clean the water was initially?)

Snack break!

Can you spot the hemangioma??

Running away...

And succeeding.

Parched after all that running.

And the water is gross...

Shortly after this pic, Sully was upset about the way I offered him some more watermelon and he flung the container and spilled most of it on the ground.  And we promptly cleaned up and the fun ended.

PS Is it ok for dogs to eat lots of watermelon?  What am I in for?

Weekend Warriors

Saturday was jam-packed for us.  It started out with the boy's first trip of the season to the Henry Vilas Zoo in Madison.

Sully with uncle Aaron, auntie April and cousin Sean.

The boys checking out the goats.

Hmmm, guess some one didn't like the carousel...

Little stinker wouldn't even sit any any of the animals or horses.

Snack break.

I guess a giraffe says, "oooooooh."

PS When do kids stop drooling???

Sean close-up.

Some one was happy to see that cousin Jens showed up...or at least that he wore that pretty around his neck.

After the zoo, we headed to High Noon Saloon to watch cousin Jens rock it out.  And rock it out he did...

He is so cool.  His band is called the Husky Nom Noms and Sully loved them.

After that, the Shagers graciously watched the littles while we went out to dinner with April and Aaron.  And we thoroughly enjoyed a dining experience that was longer than 15 minutes and didn't end in a hurried can't-you-see-what-is-happening-here-bring-the-damn-check moment.  Woot woot!!

Because...

Weekends are da bomb.  I look forward to them all week.  It has been over 3 years since I have had to work a weekend and I don't miss it one bit.  Weekends are heaven.

Because sometimes he proves he can sleep in public...

Eye lashes of an angel.

Because our weekend footwear is comfy and casual...

Because sometimes you see a Leprechaun...

 Because it is always someone's first parade...

 

 Just a little dazed after waking up to find himself at a St Patty's day parade with his Auntie Hilary and cousins.

In awe.

Because putting clips and ponytails in a boy's hair is funny...

Because sometimes you get to drink green beer...



Because some Sundays you don't make it out of your pajamas...

Because sometimes it is 80 degrees in WI in mid-March...

Cutest flipping shoes on the planet!!

Because sometimes all you need is a bucket of water, a shovel and some tennis balls to have crazy fun...

 

 Because swimming in your pajamas with your shoes on is cool...

Because playing fetch with your dog is hilarious...

Because one can never have too many balls...

Because we are wearing flip-flops in mid-March...

 Because a farmer's work is never done...

Because all that farming makes a boy thirsty...

  Dramatic drinker.


Lovin' weekends!